My aunt saved my life and she might not even know it.
I’ve always been a little strange. A little different. While I’ve embraced it now, and I’m comfortable in my own skin, that hasn’t always been the case.
During my early adolescence, I belonged on the Island of Misfit Toys. I wasn’t athletic enough for the Jocks. I definitely wasn’t getting anywhere near the Cool Kids table. I didn’t wear the right kind of clothes for the Preppies. I didn’t partake in the offerings of the Stoners. I was struggling with my faith, and with dad going through a divorce, we weren’t welcomed in the Church Crowd.
I was then, as I am now, a geek. But being into fantasy, computers, Star Wars, and Marvel in those days wasn’t cool like it is today. It was weird.
I started counting how many people would truly miss me if I was gone. The number was depressing low. Sure, my family would, but outside of that, would anyone truly care? I was discounting the love of my family like somehow that didn’t count. My biggest problem was I couldn’t figure out a nice, easy and clean way to remove myself from the picture. I glad Google didn’t exist in those days.
During this time, I was at staying over at my cousin’s house and talking to my aunt. My aunt was always a perceptive woman. Somehow, she picked up on the clues. I don’t recall her exact words all these years later, but she somehow impressed upon my heart that I was valuable.
What I do know is that I got lucky. Someone close to me recognized the path I was walking and helped. I’m so thankful for my aunt helping me through that dark time, even if she might not have even fully known what was going on in my mind. I can only encourage you to learn the warning signs and watch for them in people you love.
All those years ago as I went through my own struggles, I didn’t know about things like 211 or the National Suicide Prevention Hotline. If you are struggling like I was, or know someone who is, I would encourage you to and reach out. Call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255), or just dial 2-1-1 (if you live in an area serviced by 211).